you DID it (again)

this story is the intermediate from the last story "its killing me softly" that i wrote at 24th august.
hmm. first im really speechless.
and all i do after im speechless,im laughing soo LOUD.
and then my tears began to running down again.
i dont know exactly for many times i did it.
crying its like my mutual habit.
second usually things that i always do beside angry.
its really2 tired you know why?
you've made promises and you brake it again and so on.
its sucks. and silly.
how i describe this feeling?im become numb.insane.
and dont how easier you did that too me (i dont know for many times).
how it look so easy when you brake my heart into pieces again.
i really want to hate you and then throw you like a rubbish.(as you always do to me.)
but i cant and it looks so dumb.
everything that i do,it dont make sense in your eyes.
u gives me pain and it feelings like hell.
i always try to give you chance but you throw it.
i always try to begin to trust you,but?see?what you've done?
i really want to runaway so far away.
i really want to sleep until this pain fade away with the time goes by.

as i always told you, do everything like today its your last day in this world,bcos you'll never know when the times will stop. do something before its too late,and all you'll get only regretful then. just wait the karma will comes.

so thanks for being my 'lifeteacher'
i've learned so much things from you.
and i'll never forget about everything that you've done to me.

i believe that God always have so much ways for those who always waiting patiently.
i believe in God ways,
who always giving the best,and always will be perfect at the right time.